You Know That You’re a Dog person When…

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You know that you are a dog person when

• nobody’s feet are allowed on the furniture, except dog paws.

• it takes an entirely separate garbage can to handle the poop.

• you refer to yourself as a dog guardian and appreciate all the responsibilities that go with that title.

• you start telling your children to “Sit! Stay!”

• you’re more concerned with the dogs’ needs than your own when the budget gets tight.

• dog crates double as chairs and/or tables in your family room.

• you can only remember people’s names by associating them with their dogs.

• your overnight guest who shares your bed is offended by having to sleep with you and the dog(s).

• you snuggle closer to the dog than the person with whom you are sleeping.

• most, if not all, of your social activities revolve around other dog people.

• people at work want to know if the dogs are all right because you were late for the meeting.

• your trunk has an emergency food kit for any strays you might come across.

• the majority of your charitable contributions go to animal organizations.

• you no longer have to buy extra large garbage bags, because you have empty 40-pound dog food bags.

• your mom calls and asks how the granddogs are.

• every gift you ever get has something to do with dogs.

• your cookie jar is filled with dog biscuits.

• you rip up the carpet and lay tile to make clean up so much easier.

• your family complains that you always take more pictures of the dog than you do of them.

• most conversations you’re having is effortlessly directed back to the topic of dogs.

• your first concern when planning a vacation is whether or not the hotel will take pets.

• the number one priority when buying a new house is the size and landscape of the backyard.

• you describe your children as having temperaments rather than personalities.

• the cost of boarding your dogs equals that of your entire vacation.

• your dog decides he doesn’t like someone and you tend to agree.

• all of friends know to dress down when visiting your house.

• your friends know which chair not to sit in.

• first time visitors wonder aloud: “Do you smell something?” and you really can’t smell anything different.

• you become the family dog kennel for all your relatives.

• your desk displays your canine family.

• all dates must pass your dog’s inspection.

• the first question you ask when on a date is: “So, do you like dogs?”

• you buy a bigger bed that will comfortably sleep six.

• you break down and buy another pillow so you can have one to sleep on.

• more than half your grocery money goes to dog food and treats.

• you buy a mini-van to give them all enough travel room.

• your carpeting matches the color of your dog’s fur.

• changing a baby’s diaper makes you sick, but you have no problem picking up dog poop.

• you send out especially-made holiday cards that feature you and the dogs.

• your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend says, “It’s them or me!” and you have no problem helping them pack.

• you readily allow your dogs to give you slobbery kisses, but you don’t dare wipe a toddler’s nose.

• your dog has the best birthday party over and above any kid in the entire neighborhood.

• your dogs eat only the most nutritionally sound food.

• you’re more familiar with dog laws than you are with people laws.

• your vet’s office number is on speed dial.

• your dog files at home are really organized and are about the same size as War And Peace.

• you have dog doors.

• you’ve just spent $75 on groceries and realize none of it is for yourself.

• you are easy to shop for as all you want is anytrhing with a dog motif.

• your bedspread doesn’t have to coordinate with the bedroom as it’s always covered with a sheet.

• the family’s eye doctor is located in town, but the dog’s ophthalmologist is located an hour drive away.

• it’s easier to get a hairdresser’s appointment for yourself than it is to get one for your dog.

• dog hair in food is just another spice.

• your dogs have their own Christmas card and gift list.

• the part of your will dealing with your dogs is longer than any other part.

• the guardians of your dogs will receive a larger amount of insurance policy money than will all others.

• the instructions to the dog kennel are longer than the instructions to the house sitter.

• your personal library is heavy on dog books.

• your favorite month is April – National Dog Appreciation Month!

• your dogs have a larger wardrobe of holiday-related bandanas than you do.

• you hate to go to the grocery store for people food, but when the dog treats are gone, you go.

• you have web pages for your dogs.

• most of the photos on your Facebook page are of dogs.

• the most exciting times on vacations is when you get to pet a dog

• most of your vacation pictures are of dogs around the world.

• the largest display of collectibles in the house is dog stuff — plates, photos, cards, etc.

• You kiss your dogs when you greet them.

• You cut your vacations to 3-day weekends only.

• call long distance and talk with your dog.

• order 5 x 7 photos of the kids and order 16 x 20 of your pooch.

• your Mother’s Day (birthday, anniversary, etc.) present is a rescue puppy.

• the part of the backyard you finish first is the dog run.

• you spend more time on the computer dealing with “dog stuff” than “other stuff”.

• your “Welcome” sign and “Welcome” mat has a dog on it.

• your e-mail address is your kennel name.

• your e-mail address is your dog’s name.

• when you call your kids, you whistle for them to come.

• you call you kid’s names like you would a dog.

• you named your last child after your favorite dog.